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Relationship Advice That Actually Works (and why you're failing)

Relationship Advice That Actually Works (and why you're failing)

Mike Thurston
June 11, 2025

People think emotions just happen to them.

They think that arguments are about winning, and that solitude is something to avoid.

But all three of these assumptions are wrong, and fixing this line of thinking changes everything.

This week, Diego Perez (aka Yung Pueblo) reveals some counterintuitive approaches to emotional regulation, relationship building, and personal transformation that most people might never discover.

Let’s get into the lessons…

→ WATCH THE FULL PODCAST HERE:

Life-Changing Lessons About Mental Training:

#1 - The Foundation Reset

Sometimes true, lasting change requires doing the opposite of what got you to where you are.

Tell yourself the truth about your current state.
Embrace emotions instead of numbing them with substances or distractions.
Replace destructive habits with constructive ones (gym, walking, meditation).
Remember your 'why' - Train yourself to avoid immediate gratification.

#2 - The Emotional Weather System

Stop labelling emotions as "anger" or "sadness."

Instead, treat feelings as weather patterns moving through the mind. Doing this creates psychological distance and prevents identifying with temporary states.

→ OBSERVE without immediately naming or judging

→ ACKNOWLEDGE that "heaviness is moving through me"

→ COMMUNICATE using weather language with your partner

→ WAIT for the emotional weather to pass naturally

"I don't even need to name the emotion. It's more like tension is moving through my mind, heaviness is moving through my mind - the same way clouds move through the sky."

- Diego Perez

#3 - The Impermanence Principle

Deep meditation practice reveals the fundamental law of impermanence; everything is constantly flowing and changing.

Fighting this creates suffering; embracing it creates peace.

ATTACHMENT to outcomes creates pain when things inevitably change.

FLOW is the natural state of the universe at atomic, biological, and cosmic levels.

ACCEPTANCE of change becomes your competitive advantage.

PRESENCE emerges when you stop trying to control the uncontrollable.

#4 - The Relationship Building System

Long-term relationship success comes from treating relationship quality as something you build, not something that happens automatically.

COMMUNICATE about emotional states without expecting mind-reading.

GROWTH MINDSET - both partners must be willing to evolve.

SLOW PROCESSING - taking time apart during conflicts to breathe and reflect.

UNDERSTANDING FOCUS - arguing to understand each other, not to win.

❝

"Does this person feel right? Are they willing to grow? Do they have the humility to learn? I can love you, but I don't necessarily know how to care for you, and I need to be open to learning how."

- Diego Perez

Most relationship advice comes from people with questionable dating histories.

Diego's been with the same person for 17 years, married for 10. His approach to conflict will change how you handle every difficult conversation.

That’s it for today’s write up, hope you enjoyed and stick around for the next one.

Yours truly,